straight jacket fashion

in those moments where you always know the right thing to say, but makes you feel like your restrained from exploding the truth upon someone else... i.e.(example)

someone else: hey, whats up? , how are you doing?, hows life

you: hey , GOOD, im doing good!, life is great couldnt be better!!!!?(u make that weird face with your lips stuck together ha)

(straight jacket fashion)

the real you : hey, whats up?, not so well me and my dad got in a fight the other day over some pointless stuff and now i feel like he hates me, life could be better if i could just make him happy....?

how many times do you just shake a hand ?
how many times do you talk in circles about random things?
how many questions start with how are you? and end with im good?

how many of us really care if their life is going good or not, is your day going to change if they tell you its going horrible? would you do something to help them if they exposed their life to you, or something their struggling in?

i dont have the answer

the simple fact is that most people "dont trust" other people enough to tell them who they are so we never will get to share moments of laughter, despare, sorrow, or loy with these "friends"

ive got a confession,(the tension mounds)

for the past two years i have been lieing to pretty much all my close friends at my church, and to a person who cared i about deeply. i told this person when i entered into a relationship with them that i was a virgin, so that they might like me better or think of me highly. i lied, in high school i made a mistake, and i have to suffer with that mistake. it kills me to tell you this. when i lied to this person, i had to cover all the bases, i had to lie to a mess of people who i care deeply about, i dont really have aything to say other than im really sorry. i dont wanna be fake anymore i wanna be released and live life and ultiamatly i wanna see God again. i proved to be human i screwed up and i hope some of you can take from me that lying gets you ABOSLUTLY no where in life. take it from me its not worth losing sleep, a person you really care about, or years off your life(caused by stress of always protecting yourself from being caught).

i can only ask that you will forgive me... (dont be shy to yell at me i deserve it)

this isnt an example. this is me being real i can just hope that we can all trust each other enough to be open with what were struggling with.

Psalms38:18 i confess my iniquity im troubled by my sin
yours in the str8aight jacket
ryan,